There have been numerous recent twitterfeuds – The Kardashians, Lily Allen vs Katie Hopkins but what if twitter had been around 400 years ago? Would Romeo & Juliet have been any different? What if Shakespeare had been on twitter….
Hiya… got idea 4 new play: 2 families @ war, their kids fall in luv & everyone dies. Bit Jeremy Kyle but < 2 hours. Better than it sounds
No u shut it. Get back under ur bridge U TROLL!!!!!
party 2nite ALL welcome. Pls wear masks. #noirish #nodogs #nomontagues pls RT
@Romeo_Mong2u u seen this? U should go – Rosaline’s gonna b there & u can see what a minger she is close up
@Nurse_Booby is @Juliet_Kaput with u? Also, when r u changin ur stupid twitter handle?
INT. PARTY @ THE CAPULETS
@Romeo_Mong2u Oh alright. But no under the bra action till I’m 14 yeah?
R & J take it outside 2 balcony…think will look nice on stage with some candles?
Yo @Juliet_Kaputu r like the sun and moon – I can see rite up ur skirt from here
Can u let me in?
@Romeo_Mong2u, @Romeo_Mong2u! wherefore art thou @Romeo_Mong2u? lol
Am downstairs. Can I use ur loo b4 I p my pants?
Do u fancy me?
Yeah. Ur fit. U married?
Nah. U fancy it?
Bit sudden….Ok. When?
Cool. Better go. You hang up first.
No you hang up
Parting is such sweet sorrow.
Yo @Friar_Laurence hows it hangin?
Good here. U? Ur up early u dirty stop out lol
Yeah bin up all nite wiv @Juliet_Kaput – prob getting married 2mrw. U still doin weddings?
Yeah. Can prob fit u in 2mrw. U sure u wanna get married to a #Capulet tho?
@Romeo_Mong2u where u at?
Thx for droppin us last nite. Some mate u r
Soz @Mercutio_BFF both hands was busy
U no if u use it too much it drops off rite?
PMSL u r so funny
NE1 got the time? need 2 no what o’clock it is and I still can’t figure out roman numerals
@Nurse_Booby the little hand is on the X and the big hand is on ur bottom
Rude @Mercutio_BFF…… @Romeo_Mong2u @Juliet_Kaput wants to no if u still up 4 wedding?
Yeah def still up 4 it…what about this afternoon?
@Romeo_Mong2u & @Juliet_Kaput – u still up for this? Might be bit of family drama
@Friar_Laurence can we just get on with it? Gonna b 14 at this rate
I now pronounce u man and wife. U may kiss the bride….can I watch? Just for a bit like??
A public place
Thought u was up for a bitch-off with the #Capulets? There dissin u from wot I heard
@The_TybaltCapulet that true? U bin dissin me?
Wot u gonna do about it @Ben_Mon2gu? U and @Mercutio_BFF sittin in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g
Come here an say that you bitch
@Romeo_Mong2u u better get ur bitches off my twitter feed b4 I block u
@The_TybaltCapulet can we sort this out w/o resorting to blocking peeps?
Rude xchange of insults. Finally goes too far and @The_TybaltCapulet gets @Mercutio_BFF’s account deleted
@The_TybaltCapulet I am really cross wiv u
They fight; @Romeo_Mong2u reports @The_TybaltCapulet to twitter and his account is also permanently deleted.
O, I am fortune’s fool!
@Romeo_Mong2u did u get @The_TybaltCapulet deleted off twitter??????
Yeah but no but yeah cos @The_TybaltCapulet was a right tit-weasel @The_Lady_Kaput and he got @Mercutio_BFF deleted first
@Ben_Mon2gu U better get @Romeo_Mong2u off twitter before I get him deleted too.
@Nurse_Booby, what’s going on?
There’s been a deletion from twitter.
No…ur cuz @The_TybaltCapulet – his account has been permanently deleted!
Phew….. @Nurse_Booby I figured u meant @Romeo_Mong2u
O God! did @Romeo_Mong2u’s hand delete @The_TybaltCapulet’s account?
Yes. Little sod. U better keep ur distance.
Sposed to be goin on honeymoon 2nite. Just doubt we can get refund on room this late 🙁 🙁
@Romeo_Mong2u u online?
@Friar_Laurence yeah why?
@Romeo_Mong2u u better go to txt if we get cut off…they r gonna block ur 4G
@Romeo_Mong2u what did u expect #Capulets 2 do when u got @The_TybaltCapulet deleted??
@Friar_Laurence U THERE?? Got a msg from @The_Lady_Kaput for @Romeo_Mong2u. Assume he is with u?
Whats the msg?
@Juliet_Kaput wants to see him. And tell him from me he’s a twat.
IN THE CAPULET’S HOUSE
Soz about @Juliet_Kaput. She’s don’t wanna see no-one….she’s sulking bout her cuz.
No worries. Am pretty free this week so can pop in l8r?
Another Party @ ours Thurs?. U still up 4 marrying @Juliet_Kaput
Course….U think we should ask her first?
Nah. She never does much Thursdays.
Back 2 balcony – thinkin if we r building set may as well get sum use??
@Romeo_Mong2u u still up? Heard they was suspendin ur twitter acct? Also my dad is trying 2 block ur 4g
Can’t buhleev we aint gonna be able 2 tweet more just coz 1 person got deleted 🙁
@Juliet_Kaput… ur mum’s on the warpath – u better get offline…
@Romeo_Mong2u2 msg me later yeah if u still got signal?
@Juliet_Kaput r u up?
Ur dad has fixed u an arranged marriage with Paris_TheCount. U better keep Thurs free.
@Paris_TheCount I hear ur getting married 2 @Juliet_Kaput Thurs?!! #trickysituation
Guess we cd pretend u deleted ur account but just suspend it & reactivate l8r?
@Juliet_Kaput where u at?
Hi pops. chatted wiv @Friar_Laurence & guess I was bein a cow so I’ll marry @Paris_TheCount if u want
Good @Juliet_Kaput will msg @Paris_TheCount & tell him wedding back on
@Juliet_Kaput u want me to help u pick out an outfit for 2mrw? We can go up Westfield if u want?
Thx @Nurse_Booby but Id rather try ebay – u mind if I just hang out on my own 2nite?
@Juliet_Kaput spose if that’s wot u want 🙁
A FEW MINUTES LATER…
OMFG……@The_Lady_Kaput….U SEEN THIS!?!? @Juliet_Kaput just deleted herself!!!!!
What happened to @Juliet_Kaput? Just went online & can’t find her profile???
Did somebody say pineapple?????
@The_A.P_OCary u about?
@The_A.P_OCary Nah m8…u got sum of that stuff they give horses?
@Romeo_Mong2u Bit dodge tho bruv – u take this it can snuff u out. Not that happy 2 deal it tbh
@Romeo_Mong2u Just between us rite?
@Friar_John did u give Romeo that very urgent message I asked u 2 tellin him not to kill himself?
@Friar_John Bugger! Well I’d better get to @Juliet_Kaput before she finds out…
No UR A DEAD MAN
@Paris_TheCount No UR. I just hacked ur account…. BYE BYE
@Romeo_Mong2u! Who else u gonna delete??? This is like the twitter chainsaw massacre!
Hey all. Back online 🙂 🙂 Where is my @Romeo_Mong2u
Soz lovely…all gone pear shaped. Basically everyones bin deleted & @Romeo_Mong2u has snuffed it
#gutted. Gonna stab myself in the boob
This weren’t my fault. You can check my twitter feed.
Might be an idea @The_LordMong2u
A glooming peace this morning brings; to have more talk of these sad things;
4 such a tale of wrong u do @Juliet_Kaput and @Romeo_Mongu2
I added the poem bit at the end What u think? Cd maybe do a musical after if u like it??